Illegal Activities, and our School

I just walked up into our middle school to use the restroom, and I noticed all of their "drug-free" posters, telling the harmful effects, the risks you're taking, and just overall that it's bad.  I look around our high school, and I haven't seen any of these.  It's like they've decided that we're in high school and we aren't going to listen to a thing they have to say anymore.  I'll admit, I've done some dumb stuff in my life, but I've also learned from these.  Kids these days, even in high school, need more than the occasional assembly telling us stories about stuff that happens.  Our biggest deal in this county, in my opinion, is marijuana.  It's one of those things that's always going to be around, legal, or not.  Kids have started using other products similar to these, like the insence they sell at some stores or K2, K3, K4, which are more harmful than marijuana, just because our school drug tests them.  These products give off a high that doesn't last nearly as long as that of weed.  Therefore, our students, possibly even our future leaders of this country, are using this product more and more, intensifying the dangers.  I'm not saying that our country should legalize weed, I'm just saying, it'd be a lot more healthy if our school didn't do the drug testing, and if they'd just let us make our own mistakes.
I understand why we drug test, and I'd be willing to take one at this very moment, only because I know I'd pass.  I just believe that what we do in our spare time is none of the school's business. It's not their business what we do when we aren't in their possession.  I do believe however that it is our school's right to know if a student brings such illegal products to school.  Those rules aren't in question.  I'm not saying that PCHS is a bad school, I'm just saying they need to take a step back and realize that they're pushing their students to a much more dangerous fate, because some of the things that are impossible to test for, such as duster, are far more dangerous than that of a simple blunt.

Decisions.

It always happens the same.  The moment someone walks out of my life, everyone that had previously walked out returns.  It's like they have some batcall type thing that just screams "Hey! Steph is single, vulernable, and is to the point where she's not caring anymore, go eff up her life a little bit more, give her some more options of eff ups."  So, it wouldn't exactly say that, but it seems like it does.  The moment something ends, past interests decide they want another chance.  This is a huge problem with T.B., and a few others, but we'll keep them nameless.  I despise him, but he's one of my favorite people on this earth.  Never did I think that I could love someone I also hated.  He's a great dude, but he also is notorious for walking out of my life when I need him most, and walking back in when  I would rather just not have him anywhere near me.  This is one of those points.  If he were to walk back in at this point, it would probably not be a good thing.  I'm moving on, and I know he's going to do something to eff it up for me.  He's going to walk back in at the point when I finally get things back on track for myself. 
I love him, I know I do, but I don't think I want him back in my life right about now. 
Honestly, I don't know. He is one of those people that always has me thinking.

Thanksgiving, and Hunter(:

It's almost Thanksgiving.  After Thanksgiving comes Christmas!  Then on to New Years!  I love the holiday season, but also despise it at the same time.  Everything gets really stressful, and people get mean.  I love spending time with certain members of my family, and I love to eat the wonderful meals my Mother, Grandmother, and I make.  I'm excited to go to my Grandma's on Christmas and Thanksgiving, and to spend time with those I love.  I cherish each moment I get to spend with my Grandma, and my Grandpa too!

Hunter is back.  This is something I'm very happy about.  I love this kid with everything I've got!  There's not many people in this world I can tolerate, but Hunter is one of them.  He's there when I need him, and even if I don't, he's still there.  He's been one of my best friends for a long time.  I've known Hunter since the 8th grade, and he's been my best friend ever since.  I care about him about as much as I care about Morgan.  I've known Hunter longer than I've known Morgan, and I've been friends with him longer too.(:
It's time for Chemistry./:

Penguin Love

Did you know that once a penguin finds a mate, they stay together for the rest of their lives?  I read this in a magazine the other day, and wondered how an animal so simple, could actually fall in love and stay in love.  It seems like an impossible task.  Usually, two humans fall in love, but eventually fall out of it.  There are cases in which they're like penguins and stay together, but it doesn't seem to happen very often anymore.  My grandparents on my mom's side have been together for a very long time, I believe it's over forty years at this point.  I don't see how anybody could stick with the same person for forty years, let alone ten!  Marriage is supposed to be for love, true love, not just plain old, 'I love you today, and we'll see about tomorrow.' That would be the love I've experienced, which is probably because I'm young and careless.  I would love to be in 'penguin' love... I just need someone, that would make it worthwhile, to be my penguin.

Thanksgiving Thankfulness...

here's many things I'm thankful for this year.  It's been eleven long months.  I've had friends come into my life, and walk out.  I'm thankful for those that have stuck with me.  My soccer team is one of the things I'm most thankful for.  Even though soccer is over,  There's a few girls that have become my best friends.  They're here for me when I need them, and they understand a lot of what I have to say.  I'm pretty sure if I needed them to cover for me, most of them would do it. 
I've fallen in love this year.  I'm still thankful for it, even though it ended terribly.  I had an experience like no other.  I experienced something few people get to.  I fell in love with a boy who loved me back.  A boy that cared for me, and still does.  I care for him too, but I've learned my lesson.  Don't fight with fire, you'll only get burnt! 
Working at Hardee's has given me a sense of responsiblility, and the ability to deal with impossible customers.  For that, I'm thankful.  Life skills, taught in fast food, who would have known?
I am also very thankful for my family.  My Grandma is my hero.  She's always there when you need her, and she gives great advice.  She doesn't judge my decisions and she respects me for who I am.  Although my sister and I have had our differences, she's also one of those in my family that is there for me.  She sticks up for me when my backs against the wall, and she tries to reason with others when they start stuff.  My Aunt Heather is also someone I'm very thankful for.  I can tell her anything.  She has been in a lot of the same situations as me, and she gets it.  She's  very trustworthy, and she gives her honest opinion.

This is my Thanksgiving Thankful-ness.(:

Yet another driving Psycho....

My stories about my driving skill are probably the most epic events in my life.  On Saturday night, Morgan and I were driving to Washington, with Dana, Krystal, Chelsey, and Trevor driving behind us... I was behind a burgandy truck, that was going very slow.  I was kind of tail-gaiting, but not really.  He started break checking, and this angered me.. I didn't have a chance to pass yet, so I swerved all over the road behind him, I was very mad. he was honking, and so was I.  Finally, I pass him, and he lays on his horn, so I stick my hand out the window and flip him off...  Well, he starts riding my butt, and I just decide to drive faster, I went around a 90 degree turn at 40, and then stopped at shell to wait for my friends... Well, he pulled into shell trying to block me in... He failed... He gets out of his truck and starts screaming at me... I told him he was a creeper and he needed to leave.  He goes on to tell me that if I leave he's calling the cops.. My friends were there at this point and they were sitting in their car.  I wasn't really mad at this point, just kind of laughing at the guy.  As I go to leave, he says hit my truck, do it!  I miss it anyways, and he starts screaming "YOU'RE GOING TO JAIL!"  I get to the exit of shell, and all of the sudden get very angry.. I shut my car off, drop my phone, throw my keys at Dana's car and start walking towards the dude.  I'm screaming for him to get out of his truck, honestly I dont know what I was thinking.. He continues to drive away, phone in hand, and I'm screaming after him "Sir, get out of your truck."  I think I was going to kill him.... Haha, I was so angry. At this point everybody is screaming for me to get into my car, and that we need to leave town... So, we left.(:
Oh, and it didn't help that I was still in my halloween costume, a very short dress.... I looked pretty racy.

Letter of passion

Zane,
Stupid. That's all you are.  Incompentent, ignorant, pointless, and all around worthless.  It's all you'll ever be!!  I never thought it would be you. Tearing me down, ripping my heart to shreds, when I was at my lowest point.  it's unforgivable, and yet you still believe you have a shot at getting me back.  Putty in your dark, long, freakish hands, that's what you think of me! For so long I was, I was the one that always came back, the one that always begged for forgivness, not anymore. The tables are turned, and I'm in the fast lane.  I'm moving at maxiunm speeds, towards the sky, far away from your heartless grasp.  There's nothing more I want, than to believe you, to forget it all, to just pretend like it never happened and lay in your warm embrace once more.  This letter isn't exactly understandable, it's what I feel, and all I feel.  It's what I think about day to day, every minute of every waking hour!  You'll never know what it feels like to feel the pain I've endured, the pain that kept me up for hours, ripping into my once light, happy soul.  Fury, fury is most of what makes up my feelings for you. Love? Oh, it's there too, it's hibernating. Sleeping away, trying not to be found, trying to be unexposed  from anyones view who could use it against me.  Mostly you. If you only knew my true feelings for you, you could use it against me in the upmost horrible possible way. I let you past. Past the walls I so graciously built to keep you out, to keep anyone out!  Those walls were my safe-haven, my safety blanket, the only feeling of security I had left, and you took it.  That beautiful smile, those piercing eyes, the way you made me melt just by talking.  I guess what I'm trying to say is, yes I'll take you back... but then again, I won't.  It should be time to let go.  It should be time to move on, to say eff it, so I'll do it.... This my dear, is goodbye, so long, auf wierdersein, guten tag, or any other possible way there is to say goodbye. 

With love...

Riley Kohl<3

Throwing old women in traffic, and smoking in Chemistry

Now, I've returned to Upward Bound.  I haven't always been a major fan of it, but it's something that helps me get my homework done.  It's productive, and I tend to get more of my work done this way.  I used to hate it, mainly because I wasn't all that big on the tutor for it. She didn't do anything, and she rarely helped her students.  This woman tended to just stand over your shoulder, ask you what you were doing, and then stand there for what seemed like forever.  This got on my nerves very much.  There were points when I just wanted to smack her, or throw her into four-lane traffic during rush-hour. It's not that I'm a mean person, it's just that I'm not a very tolerant person.  I pride myself on being able to tolerate certain people, Cough* Tyler *cough, Just kidding. I love Tyler, he just needs to not punch me in the leg, or make 'blue waffle' references anymore.  Upward Bound, aka, UB, lasts from 3:30pm, until 4pm.  Nick and Chantel are here pretty much every time,  lately, I've had soccer, which has prevented me from attending these meetings, which is fine with me.  There'[s also another girl in the program, whom  I despise, but luckily, she doesn't show up to the meetings. Anyways, during these hour and a half meetings, I have to pretend to do work, as in homework and studying.  I'm not big on homework, I have all A's, and I do all of my work, yes, but homework isn't for me.  Even if it's for my creative writing class, I don't like to do it.  I'd much rather sit at home and sleep, than do any form of homework. I like to get my work done in class, that way I don't have to lug home heavy books every night.  I still need to go up and get my chemistry book, that is something that is VERY important.  I have a test tomorrow, and I need to get some questions done. 
In my chemistry class, it consists of 3 things, talking to my friends, sleeping, and pretending to care about what Mr. Weathers has to say.  Obviously, I accomplish 2 of the 3.  I do not enjoy talking to Mr. Weathers, most of the time I bs my way out of getting into trouble.  Like when he asked who lit the matches, I told him it was me, so I could light my cigarette.  This man thought I was joking... I was, but then again, I am the one who lit the match. 
In my second period class, we discovered, I am absolutely terrified of midgets.  I can't help it.  I see them and it freaks me out... Almost as bad as clowns do...(:

Stalker Alert.

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Ever had a friend, that just doesn't know when to quit?  I don't mean this in a good way either.  This friend calls me during school, gets mad if I don't answer, calls me during work, when  I'm hanging out with friends, and expects me to drop everything just to talk to him.  This boy likes me... a little too much.  I used to think Aaron was bad, but this boy, has reached an all new level of stalker.  Honestly, I'm not sure what to do.  I've ignored his calls, so he sends texts, I've told him I can't talk, so he calls me later.  If I'm in the town he lives in, he finds me.  It's gotten to the point where I'm scared he is going to find out where I live.  This boy is 21, I mean, he's okay, but there's only so much a person can take.  It's pretty sad, but he JUST called. I hit ignore, and I'm pretty sure I'm going to get a text in  a few seconds saying, Hey, why are you ignoring me!.  Then he says, well call me when you're not to busy to call your ex-husband... He's delusional.  He's annoying, and I'm pretty sure there's something wrong with him.  Honestly, I don't know what to do about it anymore..  He says I've changed, and that is why I don't like him anymore? No, dude, You've just gotten a little to suffocating.  He doesn't like my boyfriends, he doesn't like my friends... They're part of who I am, so I guess it's whatever...♥

The Last game of the Season

I must say, I have NEVER been this proud of the Lady Charger's Soccer Team.  Last night was EPIC!  There is not even a description for how amazing we did.  Forest Park was, and is still amazing.  On the second, we lost 10-0.  Last night we lost 5-0.... We kicked some grass.  I had a shot on goal((((:  Yeah, it made my night.  These girls didn't give up last night.  We played our hearts out, and I couldn't be prouder.  I wish we could have played the whole season like this. We could have won so many games.  Next year, I hope we play like this every game.  Hopefully, we have some good fresh meat coming in, and then we'll be unstoppable? Haha, there's always a hope.  Danielle, got a yellow card! Sadly, I'm very friggin proud of that.  Let's just say, Lady Chargers didn't go down without a fight

Anger(:

I never thought I'd love making someone mad...Okay, well I did, but not think i'd enjoy it this much.  It's super easy, and crazy funny. Yeah, chances are I'm going to heck for it, but hey, at least it was fun.  Just kidding, I seriously doubt I'll go to heck.  I might just be in a lot of trouble alot of the time.  Tonights sectional.  I'm so excited, that it's not even funny.  The ex is going to the game, the new interest, and Luke.  Luke's there just to anger a certain red-head on the team. Let's call her Raker.(:

It's my BIRTHDAYY!

     Today is my birthday.  I'm 17 at this point, and it makes me happy I guess.  The plans for tonight are to go to the haunted houses in the ville.  I had different plans for tonight, but those were cancelled, due to the fact that the boyfriend, is now just a friend who wanted to take me to the movies tonight... My reply?  Take your new girlfriend.(=  Bill Clinton, he's just annoying, and way to possessive.  Sure, he brought me Subway, and I love subway, but still, calling me 5 times during a game? Really?!  I mean come on!  Boys have yet to become simple to me.  There is a boy I like... He's really cool, and he makes my day.  I have two classes with him, and he's just different.  I'm pretty sure somebody told him I liked him, but he still smiles... so I'm alright with that(=, I'll probably blog more in my 5th period class.  So for now, "Happy Blogging"

--Stephh.

My Numbered Story

This party was going to be the party of the year! A smash, a hit, something to put Fierce on the map. I worked for years for this place. I put my blood, sweat and tears! For what? For you to ruin it all in one night? NO! Never would I let some stuck-up rich snob bring my restaurant down with a fight. A fight over cheating? Really? Do this at home, not at Fierce.

It started with a nice celebration. A celebration of a young couple's commitment to spend their lives together. It was beautiful, almost like a scene from a movie. I was proud that this couple chose my restaurant to celebrate. Someone had to ruin it though. They had to tell lies, and start fights. The Best Man had to tell the groom that his soon-to-be wife was cheating, even though she wasn't. He accused her of being with one of the groomsmen last night, when she was here last night, planning this dinner, planning for it to be romantic. The groom was FURIOUS. He grabbed the groomsmen one-by-one, by the neck and shook them until their eyes were wide with fright.

At this point, the poor bride was in tears. She was yelling for him to stop, and yelling at the Best Man to get out. How could something so beautiful, so romantic turn into something so psychotic?! I wanted to scream! Standing here and watching this horrific event was making me want to tear my hair out! No longer could I stand here and just watch this. Fed up, fed up was all I was. Screaming for them to stop, to get out, and to never return to my restaurant again. Embarrassed, embarrassed for them, that's all I am.

I can only pray this couple will work things out, and be happy once more. Also, I hope they never conduct themselves in public, the way they did tonight, again. Never again will I let such heathens into Fierce... The guest list will be closely watched, I assure you of this.

Disappointment for sure.

I'm very disappointed with how our team played last night.  Dana, was on fire. Krystal, was hurt, but she did her best.  I'm very proud of the girls that I have creative writing with, and I'm not just saying that because they read my blog, but because every game they work their tails off. If every person on our team had the heart they did, we would be unstoppable. Our team is good, they just don't always have the mindset.  I think if everyone went into a game thinking that we could win, and start ignoring the scores, we would be a lot better.  The score has never really bothered me.  Until the Gibson Southern game, but that's because everyone gave up.  I was so angry at that game.  Every game, I try my hardest, and I don't pay attention to the score, the score is just numbers stuck on a score board.  I think if we try our hardest, that's accomplishment enough.  I'm not proud of the way we played last night.  It should have been an easy game.  Even I could outrun half of the girls on that team, and I could get the ball away from them, and yet, it seemed like everyone gives up before the game even starts.  I despise the times when the team gets up.  It annoys the pee outta me.  Just play, it's not that hard, and don't ever give up.  Hopefully next year we can actually play with enough heart, and have the want to win..  All I have to say is our goalie better be ready if we don't.

-Steph.

No Title

Stress added! Wow, never did I think I would get into a fight with Morgan. She's my BEST friend. The person I tell everything to, the person I go to when I'm upset, and the person I would commit murder for.  We're fighting over her stupid boyfriend, no it's not one of those cases where I like him, but it's a case of hating him.  I really don't want to lose a friend over that, epically when it's him.  If I'm going to lose a friend over someone, I want him to be famous, or incredibly sexy!
      Tonight, our game is against Wood Memorial, which is a totally winnable game.  I'm VERY excited for it.  Mainly so I can rub it in their faces, and smile about it.  Danielle does amazing in goal.  I love her there, but she also does amazing on defense.  Dana plays well everywhere... and Krystal? She's Krystal.  We have other great players, like Morgan, Tanna, and Kenna does pretty well.  There's just some players that like to steal shots from other players.  These players get on my nerves, there is also some players that like to run their mouths and think they're better than other players out there. When they aren't, they do the exact same thing when they're playing,.It irks me to the core!  I love this girl to death, but sometimes, you just have to shut up!  Anyways, tonight's game shall be a toss-up.  Get it get it!!!

School isn't fun.  I dislike it. I love my english classes, yes. Mainly because I love english.  Today we have a game. I'm pretty excited.  Last year we played this team, and this girl messed up my ankle, but I kept running on it, and ignored it.  (Not the brightest I know) Anyways, this has been a stressful 2 weeks.  My parents got back from vacation, and I've had soccer or work.  I'm so tired all the time it seems.  The amazing boyfriend I was talking about? Well, let's just say his side-girlfriend thinks he's amazing too.  Due to this, we are officially OVER.  It irks me, but also relieves me.  It wasn't going to work out anyways, and I was having a lot more fun in a certain class I have with this certain boy.
   One of my best friends had recently gone to jail, for assault... He slapped someone across the face because the boy hit his sister.  Anyways, he was released yesterday, and he called me... I almost cried.  He was in there for an entire month.  An entire month of not talking to your best friend?!  It was horrible.  I'm going to see this kid Friday, on MY birthday! I'll be 17, and as you can guess I'm excited as a monkey that sees a banana.♥

Random..?

Today is a pretty alright day.  Morgan's stealing the cookies out of my trunk and bringing them into school when she gets here, they'll be stuck in her locker. Hit her up if you want one, I'm telling you, they'll go fast.  I am loving soccer.  Absolutely LOVING IT. I missed playing. It gives you such an adrenaline rush, and makes you feel invincible. Even when someone bigger knocks you down?  Just get back up and go for it.  I love the girls on my team too.  They make my day, pretty much everyday.  I wouldn't trade them for anyone, not even Johnny Depp.  Oh, how I love me some Johnny depp.  I'm in my Computer Apps class right now, I'm ahead, so I can do whatever at this point.  This class isn't too bad. Mrs. Fears? She's a nice teacher.  Anyways, I'm really sleepy.  Sleeping consists of me tossing and turning constantly all night these days.  It's been like this for awhile, and let me tell you, I do NOT enjoy it.  It's for reasons I don't care to share on my blog, if you know me, and I like you, I'll tell you... But if not, then you my dear, are SOL. (Sure outta luck) This class has about 5 minutes left, and I'm about to put my book up, so Blogg later? Sure...(=